# Talk to Me  ## Metadata - Author: [[Dean Nelson]] - Full Title: Talk to Me - Category: #books ## Highlights - Asking good questions keeps us from living in our own echo chambers. ([Location 84](https://readwise.io/to_kindle?action=open&asin=B079DR55XX&location=84)) - Good interviewers are simply themselves. They’re not acting. They’re curious. They know how to be quiet and listen. The authentic ones who ask good questions are the ones who extract profound answers instead of clichés, and who get past the surface and into something that rarely gets explored. ([Location 158](https://readwise.io/to_kindle?action=open&asin=B079DR55XX&location=158)) - Good interviews reveal information, but great interviews reveal so much more. They reveal humanity, struggle, victory, joy, grief, and sometimes a glimpse of transcendence. ([Location 208](https://readwise.io/to_kindle?action=open&asin=B079DR55XX&location=208)) - Interviewing is at the root of inquiry, of knowing, of sharing information, of sharing experience. It is at the root of storytelling. ([Location 239](https://readwise.io/to_kindle?action=open&asin=B079DR55XX&location=239)) - “I don’t care about issues,” he said. “I care about how people are affected by issues.” ([Location 278](https://readwise.io/to_kindle?action=open&asin=B079DR55XX&location=278)) - What I’m talking about here is trying to identify the stakeholders in every story. Who are the experts? Who are the people most affected? Who can provide insight? Who can educate me and then, by extension, my readers and viewers? ([Location 289](https://readwise.io/to_kindle?action=open&asin=B079DR55XX&location=289)) - For human interest, or “color.” Who can put the subject in human terms? Who can make it more interesting than just reciting facts? Who can provide details or expressions that take it out of the ordinary? ([Location 317](https://readwise.io/to_kindle?action=open&asin=B079DR55XX&location=317)) - “I look for characters who embody the paradoxical interaction between the public figure, who has very important public responsibilities, and the private person who is dealing with the mundane reality of American life,” he said. ([Location 321](https://readwise.io/to_kindle?action=open&asin=B079DR55XX&location=321)) - To portray the impact or consequence of an event. Who is affected? Who will benefit from this? Who will pay the biggest price? Who wins? Who loses? Often, the best way to answer that question is to think about the Three Es: Eyewitnesses, Experts, and Explainers. Eyewitnesses can give you the drama of what happened; Experts can give you the official version and authority; Explainers can give you background and put it in context. ([Location 342](https://readwise.io/to_kindle?action=open&asin=B079DR55XX&location=342)) - As Bob Woodward said, the goal is to get “the best obtainable version of the truth at the time.” That “best obtainable version” usually means getting multiple perspectives, and the official perspective is one of them. ([Location 414](https://readwise.io/to_kindle?action=open&asin=B079DR55XX&location=414)) - Including details of human interest is what helps readers picture the events and care about them. Details make your stories believable. ([Location 423](https://readwise.io/to_kindle?action=open&asin=B079DR55XX&location=423)) - I can’t stress this enough: Your story is incomplete until you have talked to the people on whom your topic has the most impact. ([Location 430](https://readwise.io/to_kindle?action=open&asin=B079DR55XX&location=430)) - As Ira Glass said, “It’s better if you just show up and you’re a human being standing in front of them who looks sort of normal.” ([Location 714](https://readwise.io/to_kindle?action=open&asin=B079DR55XX&location=714)) - Good interviewers give others the opportunity to give voice to what they observe, experience, ponder, question. ([Location 763](https://readwise.io/to_kindle?action=open&asin=B079DR55XX&location=763)) - One other point about getting famous people to talk to you: Make it easy for them to do this. With famous writers, I try to make it easy on them just by virtue of making their appearance an interview. ([Location 870](https://readwise.io/to_kindle?action=open&asin=B079DR55XX&location=870)) - When trying to get a layperson’s perspective, the best way to do it is to acknowledge their unique point of view. ([Location 893](https://readwise.io/to_kindle?action=open&asin=B079DR55XX&location=893)) - Reluctant sources might be more willing to talk to you if you tell them why they have a unique perspective, and why it matters to understanding the big picture. ([Location 910](https://readwise.io/to_kindle?action=open&asin=B079DR55XX&location=910)) - Preparation will do at least two things during the interview: One, it can put the person you’re interviewing at ease, knowing he or she is in good hands, which makes the person relax. Two, it can put the person you’re interviewing on notice that you’ve done your homework, so he or she had better tell you the truth, since you probably know it anyway. ([Location 1183](https://readwise.io/to_kindle?action=open&asin=B079DR55XX&location=1183)) - The interview should have an interesting beginning, it should appear to head somewhere, there should be a culminating question or topic where the person being interviewed is forced to think seriously about the response, and then there should be a “cooldown” set of questions leading to a conclusion. ([Location 1464](https://readwise.io/to_kindle?action=open&asin=B079DR55XX&location=1464)) - But how do you determine the right order? Well, that depends on the purpose of the interview. If you are interviewing someone to get his or her history, as in a “How did we get here?” interview, following chronological order makes sense. If you are looking for insight, depth, understanding—anything that isn’t concrete and quantifiable—then an order of easy, to more difficult, to even more difficult, might make the most sense. ([Location 1526](https://readwise.io/to_kindle?action=open&asin=B079DR55XX&location=1526)) - No matter what, there are three easy questions that I use to guide me when I’m choosing the order for my questions: 1) What do I need to know? 2) What does my audience need to know? And 3) What’s the most effective way to get my source to answer numbers 1 and 2? ([Location 1529](https://readwise.io/to_kindle?action=open&asin=B079DR55XX&location=1529)) - KNOWING WHAT KIND OF INTERVIEW you’re going to conduct (informal, informational, personality driven, thematic) will determine whether you write out your questions, have a general idea of where you’re headed and improvise, or just pull the trigger on the starter pistol to see where it goes. ([Location 1721](https://readwise.io/to_kindle?action=open&asin=B079DR55XX&location=1721)) - INTERVIEWING ISN’T JUST ASKING A bunch of random questions to random people. It’s a guided conversation. ([Location 1750](https://readwise.io/to_kindle?action=open&asin=B079DR55XX&location=1750)) - good guides know how to prepare the riders; they know where the best place is to start, how to be confident during the unexpected developments, and how to guide the boat to a peaceful landing. You’re the guide. ([Location 1753](https://readwise.io/to_kindle?action=open&asin=B079DR55XX&location=1753)) - That’s what any interviewer is looking for—a place where truth can thrive. ([Location 1798](https://readwise.io/to_kindle?action=open&asin=B079DR55XX&location=1798)) - You can get some great quotes and insights from sources when it’s a little less formal, and there are the distractions of traffic or food. Running errands with a source can be a gold mine. When it’s just you and your source looking at each other, it can feel a little intimidating. If you’re going somewhere together, or there are other things to look at while you’re talking, you usually get a better level of discussion. The silences aren’t as awkward. ([Location 1800](https://readwise.io/to_kindle?action=open&asin=B079DR55XX&location=1800)) - The writer Ted Conover said that the only bad place to interview someone is a site that doesn’t feel natural, like a sterile office or a conference room.1 Writer Richard Ben Cramer didn’t like to interview people in their living rooms. ([Location 1804](https://readwise.io/to_kindle?action=open&asin=B079DR55XX&location=1804)) - Ira Glass once said in an interview that if he’s ever feeling stuck, he thinks of public radio journalist Noah Adams and remembers that there is one question that you can always, always count on: “How did you think it was going to work out before it happened? And then how did it really work out?” ([Location 2093](https://readwise.io/to_kindle?action=open&asin=B079DR55XX&location=2093)) - You have to ask it directly—not through insinuation or hints. It’s unfair to raise questions about a person if you haven’t raised the questions to the actual person. ([Location 2847](https://readwise.io/to_kindle?action=open&asin=B079DR55XX&location=2847)) - As Mike Wallace used to say, there is a difference between asking a question that provides heat for heat’s sake and one that provides heat for light’s sake. ([Location 2858](https://readwise.io/to_kindle?action=open&asin=B079DR55XX&location=2858)) - It is better to lose a story than to lose your credibility. ([Location 3984](https://readwise.io/to_kindle?action=open&asin=B079DR55XX&location=3984)) - No matter how much effort you’ve put into it, the interview is not about you. ([Location 4083](https://readwise.io/to_kindle?action=open&asin=B079DR55XX&location=4083)) - Very few times in a person’s life does one get asked what she or he really thinks. I know it sounds sappy to say that interviewing someone is a way of honoring them and their stories, but I think it’s true. ([Location 4436](https://readwise.io/to_kindle?action=open&asin=B079DR55XX&location=4436))